Monday, June 18, 2007

Geek News Network

Betamax Is Still Dead
Blockbuster has officially adopted Blu-Ray over HD-DVD as their next-generation, high-definition DVD format of choice, citing widespread adoption of Blu-Ray by consumers and a lack of titles in HD-DVD. Toshiba promotional group stamps feet, pouts.

Now where's my cheap PS3?

Church of England Are Filthy, Alien-Loving Collaborators
In other Sony news, the CoE complained about the use of pretend guns in a pretend Manchester Cathedral, but have failed to oppose the pretend "alien invasion of Earth" or explain why pretend English Jesus has not stopped the pretend invasion. They have demanded the actual removal of actual best selling Sony title Resistance: Fall of Man from the actual market. Sony apologized for the brouhaha, but was far too polite to explain that PlayStation is Bigger than JesusTM.

You would think that the Church of England would understand the concept of "just pretend," considering that it was founded for the express purpose of letting Henry the Eighth pretend that he never married Catherine of Aragon.

Da Bomb
The Gay Bomb showed up in Three Panel Soul this morning.

Should Have Bought A Mac
Cheap ass Russian-made computers aboard the ISS have crashed and cannot be restarted, endangering life support and the ability to maintain orbit. In other news, my Mac has never crashed. Ever.

You're welcome.

And finally, in our last story,

Redneck Sports Kill
...if you're lucky. If you're not lucky, you have to watch drag racing.

9 comments:

Writeprocrastinator said...

"In other news, my Mac has never crashed. Ever."

May you be locked in a room for five days with nothing but PCs
; P

Big Orange said...

dude, I so totally need your help to help me throw Mt. Hood into the ocean!! THEN the CoE will have something to talk about!!

vikkitikkitavi said...

RE: drag racing kills.

All those teenagers killed. How will the local Wal-Mart deal with the labor shortage?

Natalie said...

My parents house has 3 still working betamax players. At least Blu-Ray seems to be better technology.

BeckEye said...

That gay bomb is da bomb, sister-girl.

If drag racing kills, I wish that "Fast Cars and Superstars" show would cast Lindsay Lohan.

deadspot said...

I use a PC at work, WP. That's why I own Macs at home.

Awesome plan, Big O. Let me know how that works out.

Luckily, rednecks breed like bunnies, Vikki, to offset the inevitable losses from predation, poorly maintained carnival rides, and drag racing. It's the circle of life.

What do they watch, Natalie? Oh my god... the phrase "Betamax porn collection" just came to me, and now we're both scarred.

I think this is a good time to remind everyone that Deadspot on the Web, its officers, shareholders, and employees, cannot be held liable for psychological trauma incurred in the normal use of this website. Please do not send your therapy bills.

Why the hate, Becks, why the hate?


...and when I say "Why the hate?" I mean "Why didn't I think of that punchline?"

Natalie said...

They have a pretty awesome beta collection. I haven't found any porn but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

BeckEye said...

Speaking of hate, do you hate me now that I've blown off two of your meme tags?

deadspot said...

I'm pretty sure that porn exists, Natalie. I've seen it.

Aw, I could never hate you, Becks. When I said that I was tagging everyone, it was more of a guideline than an actual rule. I didn't really expect everyone to do the meme.

On a side note, Johnny tells me that the Big Dumb Meme has already made it back to him, so it is either wildly successful, or the blogiverse is really insular. Or both.

I'm betting on insularity.